Monday, October 5, 2015

wounded frantically seeking connection



                           Seeking 

I was working in a retail store in Rhode Island, and a mother came in with her little girl about three. The mother babbled on and the little girl wandered through the store. I could feel her searching, really lost. Her dependence was totally on her mother who was ignoring her. It dawned on me that the little girl would always be lost till she was an adult and would be lucky enough to express her outrage at being ignored, neglected. Early feelings, like these, are hard to remember. As children negative experiences can easily be buried with denial. Imagine when the abuse becomes  beatings, incest, rape. Held in tremendous rage  will mostly be released through addictions 

Growing up abandoned, primary drives ignored, the nuclear family submerged into work  leads to lost and anxious struggles. As mammals we come from a heritage of being touched during our first years and being in contact with our mother completely. Think of all the mammals carrying their children for there first years. The Orgone's baby must have breast feeding contact to stimulate  Orgone. The consequences of abridgment, of a cold connection is an avenue to addiction.

People choose different forms of behavior to avoid depression, anxiety, and just general panic. Three of the most common behaviors are sublimation, O.C.D. and addictions. O.C.D. behavior buries the memories of a abused childhood; one becomes passionate about being overly perfect. Of course its impossible to be perfect but it allows one to use up Orgone and the obsession blocks everything. If sexual then the acts can be extremely bizarre. By choosing work, hobbies one moves the Orgone and achieves a respite from the lack of touch, and sexual frustrations.

Surprisingly all three can be life preserving. All move the Orgone to some degree and a partial release from the build up of Orgone is achieved and relief is felt.  A purpose is realized: I will do this behavior and live. Moving the Orgone even if invisible allows one to live with purpose and purpose moves the Orgone. The will to direct action moves the Orgone and that also drives these three behaviors. Action moves the Orgone to the surface and though the pleasure is mixed with fear it feels good to be alive.

As adults our early memories were forgotten. Then through recapitulation we began to remember. Remembering we noticed many who like weeds began to show signs of differentiation. Dysfunction began to show up. Hidden sex in the cities, in divorced open day houses, in the country, in the cornfields.We took notice but could do nothing, Perhaps the secrets started as we sought ways to find pleasurable release. If we were lucky the feelings and strange urges will be talked about between friends. Parents busy finding there own satisfaction often were too confused, too armored to communicate anything. Your on your own.

 Habits are hard to break when they give relief and addictions are a passionate habit: the gateway to further secrets. Addictions are dangerous acts, drugs of all kinds, over eating, sexual perversions. The release and pleasure from the addiction becomes paramount. The perverted act is necessary to achieve release from the blocked up Orgone. Addiction is an isolated pleasure that leads to a lonely life. 

Orgone Therapy has tools that will take one back to the original wound.That searching little girl will need to find an orgone Therapist and express her anger: being neglected is a disaster and needs a therapist to help unlock the held in rage. Expressing the outrage, the loss,ultimately will heal the organism and a feeling of exuberance will be known. Choose Orgone Therapy, and learn to make different choices. Being in Orgone Therapy is  life saving. 

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